Coffee Break 7

Farmer Joe

Farmer Joe decided his injuries from the accident were serious enough to take the trucking company responsible for the accident to court.
In court the trucking company's fancy lawyer was questioning farmer Joe.
"Didn't you say at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine,"' asked the lawyer.
Farmer Joe responded, "Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite mule Bessie into the..."
"I didn't ask for any details," the lawyer interrupted, "just answer the question.
Did you not say at the scene of the accident, I'm fine!'."
Farmer Joe said, "Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road..."
The lawyer interrupted again and said, "Judge, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the highway patrolman on the scene that he was fine.
Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to sue my client.
I believe he is a fraud.
Please tell him to simply answer the question."
By this time the judge was fairly interested in Farmer Joe's answer and said to the lawyer, "I'd like to hear what he has to say."
Joe thanked the Judge and proceeded, "Well, as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie into the trailer and was driving her down the highway when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side.
I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other.
I was hurting real bad and didn't want to move.
However, I could hear ol' Bessie moaning and groaning.
I knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans.
Shortly after the accident a highway patrolman came on the scene.
He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to her.
After he looked at her, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.
Then the Patrolman came across the road with his gun in his hand and looked at me." He said, "Your mule was in such bad shape I had to shoot her. How are you feeling?"


The Milkman

Mrs. Trent, seated in her living room, heard the back door slam.
Thinking it was her young son, she called, "I'm in here, darling... I've been waiting for you."
There was no answer for a moment and then a strange voice faltered,
"I'm sorry, ma'am, but I ain't your regular milkman."




One day a man called the church office.
He said, "Can I speak to the head hog at the trough?"
The secretary thought she heard what he said, but said, "I'm sorry, who?"
The caller repeated, "Can I speak to the head hog at the trough?"
She said, "Well, if you mean the preacher, then you may refer to him as 'Pastor,' or 'Brother,' but prefer that you not refer to him as the 'head hog at the trough'!"
To this the man replied,
"Well, I was planning on giving $10,000 to the building fund...."
To this the secretary quickly responded
"Hang on, I think the big fat pig just walked in!"
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